I’ve witnessed some horrific abuses of grammar and punctuation over the years and it’s about time someone stood up for these poor little words and symbols that can’t stand up for themselves. With that, I give you the first installment in my campaign to end grammar and punctuation abuse.
I’m officially declaring it’s Apostrophe Awareness Month! Never has a tiny dot with a tail endured so much misuse. With your help, we can make a difference in apostrophe abuse by recognizing some of the worst offenders.
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Greetings, good Internet people! I’m Opticon’s sidekick, The Deleter. I specialize in exterminating spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors with a vengeance!
I wasn’t the most popular guy in school, but rest assured all those years spent studying proper language use instead of frivolous things like ‘sports’ and ‘dating’ have really paid off! Now, I’m an esteemed Internet superhero who helps well-meaning folks like you break bad language habits so you can confidently deliver your message to the masses without error or embarrassment.
Over my years of scouring the Internet for traces of technical violations I’ve noticed that some similar sounding words confuse many of you, and I’m here to get rid of this confusion once and for all.
Here’s my list of commonly confused words and their proper, and improper, uses.
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There’s a prolific villain on the loose that must be stopped. It’s a complex shape shifter and not easy to track to the untrained eye. The villain, my good people of the Internet, is bad web copy, and it’s infecting the Web, leaving traces on websites, blogs, social networks — everywhere! Your website may have already been infected, and the damage immeasurable.
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